"At sixteen I decided it was time to take up a profession and I tried my hand at just about everything. I became a soldier, but I wasn't brave enough. I became a monk, but I wasn't pious enough; and besides, I'm a bad drinker. In despair I became a carpenter's apprentice, but I wasn't strong enough. I finally realized that I was unfit for everything, so I became a poet."
-- excerpt from The Hunchback of Notre Dame by Victor Hugo
"I have heard it said that poets are an irritable lot."
-- from The Brothers Karamazov by Fyodor Dostoevsky
"Those were days of roses, poetry and prose, and Martha all I had was you and all you had was me."
--from Martha by Tom Waits
fresh off the pages of Jim's journal...
First Amendment
In Quills the Marquis de Sade
was sentenced to life without a pen.
For the author this was death
so he wrote on his prison walls
with blood and feces, and
freedom of speech was preserved.
That may be taking things
a bit too far, but I can relate.
After they took my right arm I had
to scribble my poems as a lefty.
And here in the chemo room
my journal is a paper towel.
Hair Prayer
Hair, my hair,
it used to grow
most everywhere,
like there, and there!
But now, my hair,
is something that
is fairly rare.
Alas, despair!
Ah yes, my hair,
is disappearing
in the air.
I swear. I swear!
My share of hair
is best described
as thin and spare
without the flair.
And worse, new hair
is popping up
where once was bare
and that’s not fair!
And so my prayer
if you don’t mind,
as if you care,
is that the hair
this clown must wear
will somehow take
my heartfelt dare
and then repair
and that whene’er
I walk about
that you won’t stare
at my bad hair.
The Doofus Dad Curse
My kids won’t listen to me
when I get serious,
but they’re all ears
when I kid around
or veer off and let
a bad word slip out.
And so, in matters
that matter,
I have no voice,
unless I get tricky
and put a comedic spin
on my point-of view.
With declining health,
I’ve searched for other ways
to communicate to them
beyond slapstick and irony,
beyond sarcasm
and sleight of hand.
There’s no quick fix.
Perhaps someday they’ll turn
to my books and poems,
my wrestling-match with life.
Maybe then they’ll hear
what I wanted to say.
Weird Bird
A weird bird lives inside me
and thinks that I'm his tree.
He flies around inside my head
and whispers stuff to me.
But when I tell my buddies
these things that I have heard,
they tend to give me funny looks
and tell me I'm absurd.
It doesn't seem to help a bit
to give my solemn word
and say those thoughts came not from me
but from my head's weird bird.
Big Secret
When you lose an arm
all other appendages
grow in proportion
from Antidotes & Home Remedies
I'll Take That As a No
"Would you like me to make you
a cup of tea?" I asked cautiously.
"What I'd like is a husband
who can get his son to do
his homework when I'm busy!
Can you brew me up one of those?"
Perspective
We booked the hotel
although it was a busy time
and the rates were sky high.
Upon arriving, we learned
somebody, probably me,
had screwed up the reservation
and we had one king bed
for four tired travelers.
At one point in our lives
this news might’ve been
a point of contention.
But now? We shrugged it off.
The hotel was nice, the weather warm.
It was spring break and we were
alive with money in our pockets.
Here was our cup, half full.
The Average Person
The average person
in my situation, I’m told,
lives two years.
But they don’t say how
the average person
in my situation responds
to such news.
Do he go out
on a spending spree,
book vacations
to Paris and Rome,
climb a mountain,
apologize to every person
he ever wronged,
or just curl up
in a fetal position
and watch soaps?
I’m not sure.
But here’s what I did today.
I slept in.
I finished a good book.
I helped rake the leaves,
then cleaned up dog shit
in the backyard.
(In)Side Effects
The medical team drip, drip, dripped
ten different drugs into
my tired and confused body.
Two of the drugs were known to cause
constipation while another
would result in diarrhea.
Another drug tended toward
constipation, though some reported
diarrhea and cramping.
Afterward, I was uncertain
of my game plan. Should I go
with the fruit and bran muffins
or should I opt for meaty snacks
and dairy products? Was it
colace or Immodium A.D.?
No one had any sure answer.
I would just have to wait and see
how it all came out in the end.
Doing the Math
"You're a fairly well-known poet in Oklahoma,"
a poetry acquaintance once told me.
I wondered what the real numbers were.
We start with all of the people in the world,
then subtract the 99.9 percent
who don't like poetry.
From there, we subtract another 99.9 percent,
leaving only those poetry readers
who also happen to live in Oklahoma.
And then, we delete those Oklahomans
who read poetry but aren't particularly concerned
about who may have written it.
My badge of honor?
Amongst this rather finite group,
I'm supposedly "fairly well known."
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from I Survived Cancer, but Never Won the Tour de France...
Never, Never Land
I once thought my thirty-six year old uncle
was ancient or at least very advanced in years.
Now I long to be thirty-six again
and to stay there forever. Or, even better,
to age backwards—growing younger each year,
wrinkles disappearing, hair reappearing,
more spring in my step, and a less jaded point
of view, until one day I’m a kid once more,
like those old people in The Twilight Zone,
running giddy around the playground,
kicking the can without a care in the world.
At forty, there are plenty of concerns.
Trouble howls out in the night, surrounds
you like a pack of ravenous wolves.
Oh, to be young again! Bring on
the broken hearts, bad haircuts, braces,
puberty, acne, peer pressure, proms,
arch-enemies, homework, and first love.
I’ll behave myself better this time.
Peter Pan had it right, I think.
Crazy
let's stay up all night
ignoring this crazy world
laughing while we can
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from Like Some First Human Being...
Coffee Moments
It's not about the coffee.
We meet there, yes,
and drink as though
our lives depend upon it.
But java's just an excuse
to gather, to share a part
of who we are, to stay
reasonably connected.
We searched for paradise
and never found it--yet here
with cup in hand, perhaps
we're a latte closer.
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Some Poets I Love
Jimmy Santiago Baca
Charles Bukowski
Billy Collins
e.e. cummings
Emily Dickinson
Stephen Dunn
Claudia Emerson
Robert Frost
Jack Gilford
Jane Kenyon
David Lehman
Sharon Olds
Ron Padgett
Dr. Seuss
Shel Silverstein
Tom Waits
C.K. Williams
Jim's first book of poetry, Like Some First Human Being, was released in December of 2006. His second, Antidotes & Home Remedies, was released in July of 2008. See more in the Books section.
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