November 17, 2008

Lots of stuff happening. A lot of fun new events coming up, and I'll be blogging about my health a lot more. I'll explain more later, but check often to find out what's on the horizon.

October 29, 2008

The news from last week was disappointing to put it mildly. The pump has been ineffective. And now there are some new spots showing up in my, yikes, lungs.

As I write this, I'm having chemo in Oklahoma City. The goal is to "stabilize," to prevent further growth for as long as possible. Meanwhile, I'll see if there's an experimental trial I can join.

I, of course, want to live. I want to make it past the holidays. I want to see my daughter graduate high school. 

And I'm bound and determined to see "W" leave the White House.

The medical route has brought me this far, but they are about out of options.

So bring on the crazies. I'm now ready for dandelion therapy, for a steaming bowl of rare herb soup, for that secret pill doctors "don't want us to know about." I'm now ready to dance the hulabebang naked at midnight in the light of a full moon at Stonehenge, to rub cocoa butter on my chest in the desert sun, to shower in holy water from a distant artesian well, to eat fig leaves from Argentina. Shoot, I'll even listen to what Dr. Phil has to say, so long as it doesn't conflict with Dr. Seuss.  

Anyway, all my love!

October 21, 2008

LeAnn and I are leaving for Houston today. Tests are tomorrow, and then we'll meet with the doctors on Friday. Driving home on Friday or Saturday.

My rash is kind of miserable right now.

We saw a lot of our good friends at OSU homecoming last weekend, including the Greiners, the Dunns, Kent and Polly Tyler, Mark and Katie Maguire, Chuck Fuller, etc.

October 13, 2008

It's an off week, that is, no chemo, so I'm feeling pretty good. Plus, I had a couple of good gigs this weekend, I've been working on a new book, and OSU somehow won a big football game, so I'm feeling even better. 

Next week, LeAnn and I head to Houston to see if I've had any promising results from the pump. Yikes!

October 2, 2008

Things got a little scary last Friday.

I was scheduled for chemo, the same type I'd had about a dozen times before. But on this occasion, my body had had enough apparently. As the chemicals began dripping in, I suddenly had a hot flash. My face and hands turned blood red, my throat began constricting slightly, and I started vomiting. I was like the girl in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory who turns into a blueberry.

Luckily, I was able to flag someone down. The doctors and nurses came running. They gave me steroids, then a big dose of benadryl and phenergan. I slept for hours after that, as they finished the rest of the infusion. But it looks like I'm done with that type of chemo.

A trip to Houston in two weeks to see if the pump has done anything promising. Crossing my fingers for that trip.

September 17, 2008

I was supposed to be in Houston yesterday, but due to the hurricane my flight was cancelled. So we've moved it to tomorrow. Right now it looks like the flight will go ahead. In Houston, I'll have my pump reloaded with chemo.

This was my second Houston trip affected by such storms this year. My kids and I drove through Edouard in August. Now Ike has left Galveston and Houston in shambles. On Saturday, we drove to a wedding reception near Wichita Falls. The weather was iffy, as Tropical Storm Lowell was set to clash with Hurricane Ike over Texas that night. We left in the rains of Lowell and arrived in the outer bands of Ike. But as the reception began, the skies cleared and it was a nice evening. The weather in Oklahoma has been fantastic this week, cool mornings, low 80s by afternoon, and little wind. This is why fall is my favorite time of year, despite the surgeries I seem to have every year around this time.

I've been trying to get together with friends as much as possible. During the last two weeks, I've seen many of you. These are scary times, for many reasons, and I'm glad I have such a great community of friends.

September 3, 2008

Whew! It's been a rough 3 weeks since I last wrote. Time flies when you're... well, you can add your own ending to this proverb.

When I last wrote, I was leaving Houston after surgery. That was such a blessing, going home, as I was pretty maxed out from the hospital stay, 37 staples, loss of my gall bladder, a metal pump in my gut, no sleep, no eating, anesthesia, etc. So I spent a restful six days back in Norman, primarily watching the Olympics.

After that I headed back to Houston, where they loaded my pump with chemo, took out the staples, and gave me various medical supplies for the month. I flew in and out the same day, thanks to Andy N., a guy I don't even know who called and offered me round trip plane tickets because he has a bunch of frequent flyer miles.

Back in Norman, I seemed to turn a corner on August 22 and spent five days in relative peace and harmony, feeling pretty good. But then, on the 27th, I began my new chemo plan.

On that bizarre day, the entire nursing staff at OU's oncology infusion center attended the "flushing" of my pump (these pumps are rarely used anymore, so no one has seen how to load and unload them). There I was pulling up my shirt and showing off my new scars to 12-14 people (all but 1 were women) in a private room with everyone observing, cracking jokes, etc. A strange party for sure.

Perhaps I was still a bit run down from surgery, but the new chemo regimen (my 17th round, if you can believe that)wiped me out. Once a month, I will have chemo infused over my entire body. Then I will take a pill form of chemo for two weeks, three pills in the morning, three at night, yikes! I started throwing up the day after chemo and was nauseous and lethargic for the next five. I've lost about 15 pounds since surgery. Today, I'm back at work, feeling somewhat better. The doctors will try some new approaches to avoid nausea. The rash is slowly returning again, but so far it seems less severe, for some reason. I head back to Houston on September 17, and the process all starts again. Fun, fun, fun...

August 13, 2008

Going home today!

It's been a grueling week, but I can finally see a light at the end of the tunnel. I checked out of the hospital on Tuesday morning, five days after my surgery. Had hoped to leave Monday night, but was feeling too woozy.

Spent the last day in a hotel across the street, resting, watching the Olympics, trying to eat, sitting on the toilet.

Tuesday was much better than Monday, and today has, so far, been better than Tuesday.

I met with my doctor. They checked my incision, gave me instructions, said all looks good. I'll be back in one week to begin treatments though.

So I fly home this afternoon, and then have six days of rest.

Whew!

August 10, 2008

I'm sitting at a computer at MD Anderson. I still have two IVs in, although surgery was Thursday.

Things supposedly went well. No new cancer was found, the tumors in my liver had not grown while I was off chemo, and the pump went in fine and dandy as they say in Mayberry.

Not the easiest surgery I've ever had. My left arm is a pin cushion from all the needles and shots I've received. I'm pretty bruised up too.

Finally got to eat today, for the first time since Tuesday. Pain is... pain.

The family leaves tomorrow. I'm hoping to follow on Wednesday or Friday.

Thanks for checking in.

August 6, 2008

Well, I somehow made it through yesterday. Tropical storm Edouard was a fun last minute addition to our latest adventures. About two hours of driving rain. But the winds weren't so bad, forty miles an hour maybe.

I've been visiting with doctors today. Surgery is tomorrow at 7:30 a.m. Arrive at the hospital at 5:15 a.m. Am already not allowed to eat. They will fix the colon, remove the gall bladder, install a hockey puck-sized pump. In the hospital 5 to 7 days, then in Houston for another day or so. Will have to come back two weeks later to begin chemo. They said no driving a car for three weeks. Yikes!

I had to cut off the majority of my hair this week. The hair has been destroyed by chemo, the curls were no more. My hair stylist said there was nothing she could do. But it looks much better now. Short and a bit delicate, but I'm glad there's still some left.

August 3, 2008

It's Sunday, four days before my next surgery, which is something like my fourteenth time to go under the knife.

We leave for Houston on Tuesday. I will meet with doctors throughout the day on Wednesday. On Thursday, the fun begins.

True to my word, we lived it up this week, going out with friends and family on a nightly basis. The staff at the Mont are probably beginning to wonder about me.

We received Ford's new CD on Thursday and now we begin the hard work of getting it out there. Please let me know if you know a music insider to whom I should send a copy. And it can be ordered on my website, fyi.

I hope to write shortly after surgery, but we'll have to see how it goes. So for now, it's over and out.

Oh great, just read that a hurricane is forming and expected to hit near Houston on Tuesday. When it rains, it pours.

July 27, 2008

Well, surgery is eleven days away. Not looking forward to that, but I plan on living it up till then.

Ford and I had a great weekend, while LeAnn was away in Denver and Maddye was spending time at her Granny's. We went to D-Fest, a huge outdoor music festival where Ford's band played last year. Saw a lot of great bands, like the All-American Rejects. And I had a fun book signing in Bartlesville, the town where I grew up. I saw many old friends, like Rhonda Bailey, Marcy Word, the Harrisons, Dawnette Brady, the Webbs, Mary Lou Fielder, etc. What fun!

Many good book things happening, but I'll spare you the details.

July 21, 2008

Surgery has been scheduled for August 7th in Houston. I will supposedly be in the hospital for a week. And maybe in Houston for longer than that. Obviously, this gets really tricky with the beginning of school for LeAnn and the kids.

And so, we're kind of in a collective funk about the near future. Once we leave, will things ever be "normal" again?

On the positive side, we had a great weekend with many wonderful friends. On Friday, we saw Batman. On Saturday, we joined poets and friends for a reading and sushi at Kangs in Edmond. And then on Sunday, we had eight families to our house, about 30 people total, for barbeque, swimming, assorted beverages, and a lot of talking about the good old days. This is what it's all about, methinks.

July 17, 2008

After a difficult trip to Houston, we've returned home to enjoy life between now and surgery in August. On Sunday, I had a great book launch party at the Depot for my second poetry volume, Antidotes & Home Remedies. Something like 80 to 100 friends, family, poets, and curious folks gathered last Sunday for food, fellowship, music by my son Ford, and a brief poetry reading. It was a highlight for the year, that's for sure. I had a blast. We truly have the world's greatest friends. If you only knew. And I've received some good comments on the book, from the likes of David Boren, Wilma Mankiller, and the Norman Transcript. So, yea!

Some of you got to hear a few selections from my son Ford's new CD, which we expect to have in our hands in about two weeks. We're planning a CD release on September 5. And Ford will play with me this weekend at Kang's (a Sushi place) in Edmond. Great fun! You can get a copy of the CD from us if you want one, or order one on this site.

We're hosting a group of my college fraternity buddies at our house this week, some of my dearest friends. I'm so looking forward to that. And LeAnn and I will have our 21st anniversary on July 25! Yikes, I'm becoming a geezer!

July 10, 2008

The news from Houston is disappointing, I'm sorry to report. After three more months of chemo, an aggressive coctail with tougher side effects, the tumors did not shrink. (They did not grow, but they did not shrink, which is what we need in order to get to surgery on the liver.) And so, my options are becoming fairly limited.

The doctors had a lengthy pow-wow and recommended that I have surgery next month to install a pump in my abdomen. The pump will administer chemo directly to my liver, thereby improving the chances of shrinking the tumor that is preventing surgery. Still a long-shot (one doctor was more optimistic than the other), but they agreed this was the best option. The pump will decrease the side effects to the rest of my body, although I'll still have some chemo locally in between treatments.

During the surgery, which will take place a month from now in Houston, they will also operate on my colon, to make sure that cancer doesn't reappear. After the surgery, I'll have to go to Houston once a month to have a new chemo coctail infused.

On the positive side, the Cubs have won three in a row!

Seriously though, it was disappointing news that even seemed to surprise the doctors. But let's look for silver linings, shall we? Today is a beautiful day. It could wind up being the best day of my life, who knows? I may make some memories today or this week that will forever impact those I love. I'll have no chemo for several weeks while awaiting surgery. The cancer has not grown. My new book comes out this week and is generating some positive comments. And maybe the pump will do the trick. If not, we'll march forward with our heads held high.

July 5, 2008

Here we go!

Tomorrow, LeAnn, Maddye, and I head south to Houston where we'll find out big news regarding my health. That is, have I progressed enough to have surgery, am I nowhere close and surgery is out of the question, or something in between. None of the potential news sounds all that good. But who knows, maybe that long-awaited miracle will finally come.

It's a scary time, and the waiting tends to mess with our minds.

Please pray, or send good thoughts, or do whatever it is you do to make sense of this crazy world. We hope to see you soon.

June 26, 2008

My family's just-in-case attempts to put together a "Bucket List" (the list of stuff to do before you kick the bucket) have been somewhat comical. First, we decided to go salsa dancing in Mexico. We somehow convinced our teenagers to join us for lessons and located an instructor who had the creativity to teach a one-armed guy how not to look too ridiculous. We had a great time at lessons and practiced hard afterward in the privacy of our own home. But when we got to Mexico, we couldn't find a dancing club that would let in our 14 year old. So, no salsa dancing in Mexico.

Next, we decided to get tattoos. We argued with our kids about how big a tattoo they could get and on what particular part of their body. We thought long and hard about what our own tattoos would be. We headed to Austin and chose their best tattoo parlor--only to find that you have to be at least 18 to get a tattoo. Duh! So no tattoos.

Next, we decided to put sky diving and my own would-be adventure up Mount Kilamanjaro on the list. But then we priced those additions and they became subtractions. No skydiving and mountain climbing.

But things are starting to look up. Our friends took us to Las Vegas, my first ever trip. I gambled 25 bucks!!! Broke even. So that was crossed off the list. Then, I had my first real martini. I won't have to do that again, although the olive was good.

And yesterday, after waiting 25 years, I saw Tom Waits in concert with my son Ford. This was at the Old Lady on Brady in Tulsa, a concert venue where I once saw Tommy Tutone. Ha. That was high on my list, cuz I've been a diehard Tom Waits fan forever, and he never tours anywhere close to here. But somehow a miracle occured and I saw one of my true heroes give a killer show.

As for the rest of the list, we'll see...

As for my health, a big date looms on the horizon. I go to Houston on July 6. Tests will be on the 7th and we will talk to my doctors on the 9th. It will be a stressful trip, and we're not really looking forward to it. And as we get closer to it, the stress continuously mounts.

Please pray for my family. I can honestly tell you that we are just barely holding on right now.

June 9, 2008

After several feelin' good days, I head back to the hospital tomorrow for my 15th round of chemo. Last time, I received 13 separate drugs on chemo day, if you can believe that. For those of you who know me well, I'm kind of a lightweight when it comes to drugs, except crack. (That's a joke.) So I'm pretty sure my body is wondering what the heck is going on. It's never fun to think ahead concerning those terrible Tuesdays. And so, one day at a time, right?

The rash that attacked me has turned into a sort of overall redness on my face and forehead, so that I now look kind of tan when the lighting is poor or like W.C. Fields after an alcohol binge when the lighting is good. As for the rash on my body, it looks like the measles and torments me as far as itching is concerned. I'm told this is a good sign, that the rash broke out so severely. The next good sign? When my ears fall off.

Seriously though, we are glad it's summer break and are looking forward to getting together with as many of you as possible in the upcoming months.

Thanks for your prayers. We need them.

May 29, 2008

I've just finished my FOURTEENTH round of chemo. Yikes! It's now been 8 months since my most recent diagnosis and 7 years (May 31, 2001) since I first discovered that dreaded place on my arm. How time flies when you're having fun.

On Tuesday, I had 13 different drugs placed into my system to combat all the various things that are out of whack in my body. That's a lot of medication, me thinks. Too bad they don't have one yet to combat sarcasm.

Yesterday, I was up and down. Today? Feeling okay so far.

Turning in my final poetry manuscript this week and my new book should be ready for July. Planning a book release party for that month, on Sunday, July 13th, at the Depot in Norman. Please make plans to come if you can. It will be in the afternoon.

May 20, 2008

So, summer break's almost here and my family's sooooo looking forward to it. Last weekend the weather was great and we had an enjoyable time hanging out in the backyard. Maddye had friends over to swim, we got out several times on our bikes, and I finished a couple of good books.

My neighbor Eve has been such a blessing. From time to time, she has shown up on our doorstep with a home-cooked meal, somehow sensing when we are spinning out of control. Eve is one of those people who makes a difference without ever calling attention to herself. I hear her sister-in-law is struggling with cancer. I can only hope and pray that things will go her way in the near future.

Made it through round 13 of chemo. Resting this week and trying to regain my strength.

Ford is playing in the singer/songwriter's showcase this Friday at the Norman Borders. Come on out if you get the chance. 8 p.m.

May 12, 2008

Well, I begin my 13th round of chemo tomorrow morning. The new chemo has caused more fatigue, more nausea, more, uh, unmentionables.

Last week was pretty discouraging, to be honest. I was more tired and weak than I've been during previous treatments. Then, I suddenly began breaking out with the forewarned rash/acne, from head to hip. Literally hundreds of splotches on my body. As I looked at myself in the mirror, I thought, "I don't know if I can take much more of this crap."

But after a day's pity-party, I decided to forego the "woe is me" Job attitude and take a "bring it on" Lieutenant Dan (Forrest Gump) attitude. It also helped to see some good friends towards the end of the week and my grandfather, whom I hadn't seen in a decade. These visits were good for the spirit, as were some antibiotics that are slowly improving my complexion again.

April 30, 2008

12 rounds of chemo down, including 2 rounds of the new kind and a new drug they hope will better target my liver. Pretty wiped out by it all really, but it's hopefully extending my life.

This has been a busy month for events. I read at the Scissortail Creative Writing Festival, the Oklahoma Symposium, a Cheyenne poetry event, and a house concert in Houston. My wife ran the half marathon in OKC last weekend (I'm very proud of that accomplishment), Ford's band played the Norman Music Festival, the Arts Festival in OKC, and he did a solo gig at that same event. Maddye has been busy filming media projects, getting ready for prom, and helping out because her slacker Dad has been gone so much.

May and June look to be fairly quiet. Ford's new EP will be released soon, so we will be planning a release party for that. My new poetry book should be out by July.

Over and out.

April 10, 2008

Just back from Houston and the news is so/so. The tumors in my liver had shrunk about 20% since my last trip, maybe 30% overall, but not enough to perform the surgery. So, back to chemo again. They will change the chemo drugs with hopes that I'll get better results.

That means 4 months of chemo and then back to Houston again. That may be my last shot at the surgery. No new cancer anywhere, though, and the colon looks good, so to speak. :)

As if I don't already look silly enough, the new chemo will thin my hair more and cause acne. Yea! I'm looking forward to that.

April 7, 2008

Ten rounds of chemo are behind me now, as I face Houston and new tests. I'm writing from my Houston hotel and will head over to M.D. Anderson this afternoon, where I'll be poked and prodded like a lab rat. Tuesday is an off day. Then on Wednesday I'll talk to my doctor before driving home.

I want to thank those of you who helped my family this week. It's a difficult time, so we truly appreciate those who helped pave the way for our trip. You know who you are.

March 20, 2008

My 9th round of chemo is complete, and I'm taking an extra week off before completing my 10th round. After that, I'll head to Houston (April 6) to see how things stand. LeAnn will fly out after a couple of days and then we'll drive back.

We've just returned from Austin, where we spent a couple of days reading, relaxing, watching movies. I still feel weak, but pretty good overall.

Stalled a bit on the new book because I was feeling run down, but I'll be back at it this week.

I have a bunch of fun poetry gigs coming up in April. Ford is completing his new EP, which sounds terrific.

Peace.

February 24, 2008

Every new day, without chemo, is good.

I've finished chemo number 8, and, after a hard week, I'm getting stronger again. The big date ahead is April 9, when I will be in Houston to see how I've responded to treatment.

I've finished the first 5 chapters of my new nonfiction book, and my poetry book should be ready in June.

February 6, 2008

LeAnn and I truly have the greatest friends in the world! We've just returned from Las Vegas with our dear friends the Greiners, who put the whole trip together and invited us to join them. What a wonderful gift that was. We had a fabulous getaway weekend and loved catching up, as we have with so many of you recently in so many different ways.

Also, some other friends set up a medical fund for us at a local bank. See the Friends page to learn more.

Yesterday, it was back to OU Physicians for my 7th chemo treatment. As I write this, I've got a little pump strapped on to me that injects chemo over a two day period. No fun, that's for sure, and the treatments tend to wipe me out. But hopefully it is extending my life. Because, dang it, I still have a lot I want to do!!!

Right now, I'm working on a new poetry book for release this summer and my second memoir, I Survived an Amputation, but Never Became the Bionic Man, which will focus on stories that illustrate what it is like to become suddely handicapped. I'm also mapping out another: I Survived Parenting, But Never Became Father of the Year, because so many of you have told me to write about my kids.

We love you guys!

January 23, 2008

Thanks to a gift from a generous group of friends, my family traveled to Mexico in mid January for a break from all the chemo and difficult news. We spent four glorious days on the beach (85 degrees) reading, writing, and relaxing, perhaps even sipping a few choice beverages. It was great to get away. We left Mexico last Thursday and two hours later we were in Dallas, temperature thirty degrees. Yikes!

I started chemo again yesterday, my sixth round so far. I'll be doing this for the next 3 months, hoping it will help out enough for a surgery.

Meanwhile, I'm trying to pursue the things I love. I'm actively working on two new books. I'm in a good poetry groove right now (bad times make for good art, they say). I'm writing new articles for Oklahoma Today and the Gazette. I've been booking some gigs, which you can check out on my website. Mark Erelli is including the song you hear on this site (which we cowrote) as a bonus track, which means if you buy his new CD you can go online and download the song.

By the way, if you are interested in booking a house concert (music and poetry) with me and my good friends Beth Wood and Nathan Brown please let me know.

Thanks again to all of you for your acts of kindness. One of my greatest joys has been the letters I've received from you, reminiscing about the old times, talking about life, and sharing what is happening now. Please keep writing!